#recipe leaflet

[monkeyssalad-blog]

M.E.B. Christmas Fare : Xmas 1955 : recipe leaflet : Midlands Electricity Board : [Birmingham] : 1955 by mikeyashworth Via Flickr: It's a merry Christmas from the old M.E.B. - the Midlands Electricity Board based at Mucklows Hill just on the edge of Birmingham and the nationalised concern whose supply and distribution area covered much of Central England. The leaflet gives details of various Christmas recipes to prepare in an electric cooker and suggests that, as a present to yourself, why not get an electric cooker? I suppose suggesting you bought one as a present for someone else might be seen as being over generous.

[sluttyquarantinetheory]

I find it really funny when people voice their complaints about a video game by comparing wildly different elements. Saw someone complaining about how bg3 should have less soup recipes and more body type variance. And while I don't disagree on the need for more body types, the amount of difference in how difficult it is to add a soup recipe to a game verses allowing your character be fat is monumental. You can add a soup recipe in an afternoon. Not even. A customizable fat bodied character is a whole other ball game. Like I promise you the reason we didn't get fat characters is not because they spent too much time on the soup.

[riacte]

Unconventional format / mixed media / meta / epistolary fic ideas:

Script format but the characters slowly break fourth wall until they grow self aware and scream to leave but the script confines them.

Mock up notes of an author's fic outline only for a "fan favourite" / "author's darling" character to gain sentience and influence the story. The character changes the outline to suit their own agenda, and their changes are marked with a different colour whereas black text means it's the author's will. Maybe another character using another colour gains sentience. The different colours fight for dominance. Mom says it's my turn with the keyboard hey what the fuck man excuse me I'm literally trying to save my family can you guys let go and let me write your character arcs in peace OH FUCK OFF

Recipe fic. The story is told via those unnecessarily long backstories on a recipe blog in which you learn about someone's grandma or a breakup or literally anything. Bonus points if the actual recipe deals with worldbuilding (what ingredients are available? What utensils are used? How to serve this meal? Woohoo Dungeon Meshi) or in-cheek recipes (eg. "Recipe for making up with your estranged mother - Step 1: Mix patience, nostalgia, and filial piety and let it marinate for ten years. Step 2: Throw that shit into the trash because you're better than that")

Travel fic. A character is lost and trying to find their way somewhere. GPS directions, googling "x place to x place", tickets and dates, train station maps, leaflets. It gets weirder and weirder. You never get closer to your destination. You're walking around in circles. It's always 10 meters away. Where are you going and where have you been?

Receipts. Try to infer what a character is doing judging from the weird things they buy together. Also yipppee inflation tracker. On the other side, maybe it can be about a cashier/ shop owner getting to know their customers and what they order.

Written from the pov of an non-native English speaker, all the English words are italicized whereas their native tongue are the only words not italicized. Inspired by Kupu rere kē by Alice Te Punga Somerville. This is because I got salty about people from Ao3 Reddit saying they won't read a fic in all italics.

Murder mystery / "Among Us" style impersonation fic strictly using the chatfic format. Characters and readers will have to figure out which character has been killed and replaced from the way they text and use emojis. This is also because I got salty about Ao3 Reddit being a wee bit pretentious about emoji usage in fics. Maybe emojis can be important plot devices! Some people prefer to sign off messages with a heart emoji of their signature colour, so won't it be weird if they use another coloured heart? How about someone using lapslock suddenly using proper capitalisation and full stops? Can you tell if someone's phone has been stolen? What if someone's mother is pretending to text like their child? Why is someone suddenly only using UwU speak? Is it a bit, or have they been replaced?

Innocuous second person POV until the last line where it's suddenly revealed to be first person POV all along and the "I" has been stalking and narrating "you".

Other fun bits / Easter eggs / secrets to hide:

Decoding within the text itself. Maybe we get given instructions to find a word in x chapter on page y on the nth line. And when we as readers collect all the words, they form a sentence that spells out an important fact which the characters are oblivious to. Or maybe the in-universe characters find a book with the same title as the irl fic with a bookmark in it, and if you go to where the bookmark is stuck irl, you'll find the murderer plainly stated. The rest of the fic is about the readers having hard confirmation of who the murderer is while characters don't know.

A phrase is subtly repeated throughout the text of the fic and is spelled out with the letter that begins a sentence. It gives off the effect that the narrator is screaming and crying into the void (to the readers in the fourth wall) while trying to avoid detection. Bonus points if the same word is repeated for pages and pages to the point the lack of sentence variation feels weird and clunky.

Morse code!! I love morse code! Using onomatopoeia to convey the dots and dashes! The sound of rain pattering on the tin rooftop— drop, drop, drop. A low whistle of a train rumbling in the distance. He slowly sharpens his knife, creating a shiiing sound. A lengthy, high pitched squeal from his kettle. A dog barks. A sharp knock. His heart thumps. Dot dot dot, dash dash dash, dot dot dot. SOS. Maybe a character's death scene spells out the name of their mysterious murderer. Maybe a character is reminiscing their deceased loved one and the scene spells out what the deceased person would've wanted to tell them— "LIVE ON" or "I LOVE YOU" or something.

[najia-cooks]

Wood sorrel soup with green peppercorn and mint

The wood sorrels—sometimes called sourgrasses—are a group of extremely widely distributed edible weeds in the genus Oxalis. As their name suggests, wood sorrels have a distinctly tart flavor due to the presence of oxalic acid. The seed pods of the wood sorrels are crisp and quite sour, and are therefore sometimes called fairy pickles. Wood sorrel is a commonly foraged green which grows well in disturbed areas, woodland, lawns, and gardens; it may be used as a pot herb or a salad green, or brewed into tea.

This recipe is for a blended soup similar to schav (Yiddish): an eastern European soup made with common sorrel (Rumex acetosa), vegetables, and smetana (sour cream)—and to potage crème d'oseille: a French soup made with sorrel or other sour, foraged greens; broth; eggs; and cream. In my version of this soup, the bright, lemony sourness of wood sorrel is deepened with garlic, tempered with a non-dairy milk, and complemented by the fresh, earthy, citrusy notes of green peppercorn. A garnish of chiffonaded mint or green onion adds some herbacious sharpness that plays well against the fresh wood sorrel.

Recipe under the cut!

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Ingredients:

50g (1 cup packed) yellow wood sorrel

1 small sweet onion

3 cloves garlic, crushed

Margarine, to fry

Salt to taste

1 tsp ground green peppercorns

2 cups vegetable stock

1/3 to 1/2 cup non-dairy milk, to taste

1 Tbsp flour

Mint or green onion, to garnish

Besides common yellow wood sorrel (Oxalis stricta), procumbent yellow sorrel (O. corniculata), or slender yellow wood sorrel (O. dillenii), will also work.

All three species have leaves which are alternate (one leaf per node), trifoliate (three leaflets per leaf), and petiolate (attached to the stem by a leafstalk, rather than directly); have heart-shaped leaflets; and have yellow, five-petalled flowers. Leaflets open in the sun and close (folding downwards) at night.

O. stricta plants grow upright when very young, but are afterwards recumbent; each plant has only one root, so the stems are not truly creeping (sending down new roots at the nodes). Stems may have small hairs spreading away from the center. Flowers appear in branched clusters, usually from 5 to 7 per inflorescence. Pedicels (seed pods) are erect.

O. stricta roots once; if young and light, it is upright. If mature and heavy enough, it will lie recumbent along the rest of its length without rooting again.

O. corniculata plants are prostrate, spreading via overground stolons which root into the ground again at the nodes. Pedicels are deflexed (hanging down) or horizontal.

O. corniculata spreads along the ground; if you try to pull up a mature plant, you will note it is rooted at more than one point (if soil is available).

O. dillenii is sometimes considered a type of O. stricta. Plants are erect and may reach over a foot in height. Flowers usually appear in 2s, but there may be as many as 6 per infloresence. Stems have appressed (lying flat against the stem surface) hairs. Pedicels are reflexed (bent).

O. dillenii, upright with hairy stems and seed pods whose peduncles have a sharp bend in them, like an elbow. Leaves sometimes slightly reddish.

Instructions:

Wash wood sorrel in a bowl of water, then draw the plants out to allow dirt to sink to the bottom. Include leaves, stems, seed pods, and flowers.

In a large soup pot, melt margarine on medium-high. Fry onion, garlic, a pinch of salt, and half the green pepper until the onion is golden brown.

Add sorrel and heat until thoroughly wilted.

Add stock and simmer 10 minutes.

Whisk flour into 1/3 cup non-dairy milk; add the mixture to the pot and whisk. Taste and add another splash of milk if the soup remains too sour.

Add remaining green pepper and salt to taste. Simmer another 3 minutes or so.

Garnish. Serve hot or cold.

[mortalityplays]

The phenomenon of the ultra polished “zine” fucked with my perception of independent art in a bad way. My first show years ago I stressed myself sick about the quality of my work, then overpriced my stuff and was unable to connect with the other vendors.

Learning to let myself make low stakes, messy and cheaply made zines has genuinely helped pave a healthier and more joyful relationship to my work. At a show this year I had exclusively single sheet zines and had a blast sharing and trading, plus I made friends!

I really hope the word association with glossy publications dies soon and zines get weird and shitty again.

it's absolutely breaking my heart how many people in the notes of that post are relating similar experiences. people being rejected from submission based artbooks that market themselves as entry level amateur community projects. people going to their first cons and having their confidence shattered by professional level work labelled 'zines'. people getting screwed out of payment or not receiving books they paid for, and being shamed out of pursuing it because it's 'just a zine'. younger people who didn't even know zines were supposed to be handmade!

we have to rescue zines, we have to teach people the joy of making a little book of soup recipes from scrap paper and trading it for a little book of titty affirmations. a zine is an ikea instruction leaflet you coloured in. a zine is a manifesto about liberating e-bikes, illustrated with a roll of price stickers you found in a drawer. we cannot tolerate a minimum entry requirement.

[russellsppttemplates]

Can we have a little something more about Thomas and Élodie? I find it very cute that they get together and are something like high-school sweethearts! Also, Pierre and Charles are officially family! Can you imagine?! And Y/n Leclerc and y/n Gasly are also bffs and family. Wow, they're entwined!

It would be interesting to see Elodie and Thomas getting into a fight about something silly.

"I can help, too", Élodie added, getting up from her spot on the sofa and joining the boys outside. The Gaslys were spending their holiday with the Leclercs and the boys had bought a new game table that needed some setting up.

"Mama just called me and I need to start some things in the kitchen for lunch", Hervé called, "I can help", Amélie told her older brother, "this whole building thing can be your task", she pushed it to Alexandre, seeing Louis and Celeste debating on what team they should join, "will you be making that salad you did yesterday? Because if so, I'm im", Louis noted, seeing Hervé nod as Celeste followed him to the kitchen.

The sun was shinning and, for the most part, it should be a pleasure activity to build the table so they could use it to play together, but things started going south as soon as Élodie flickered the pages on the instructions leaflet, organising the different pieces according to the steps, "Amour, we'll just do it as we go", Thomas said, not thinking that hell would flip over at his suggestion, "it's best if we follow these", Élodie insisted, "we'll be fine".

From then on, Élodie only did something whenever Alexandre asked her, choosing to ignore her boyfriend until their parents arrived, calling everyone to the dining area as they spread out the take out boxes and brought what the rest of the group prepared in the kitchen to the table.

"What's wrong with them?", Charles heard his wife ask him, "they seem fine, mon amour, why w-", he replied, being interrupted by his son's girlfriend, "see? They followed the recipe, otherwise this wouldn't taste as good as it does. Because they followed the standardised instructions to make it", Élodie snatched the bowl from her brother's hand, taking a big serving for herself.

"It does seem something is up, yes", Charles corrected himself, grabbing the water bottle and pouting himself a glass.

By the time Pierre was helping in the kitchen since he was able to reach the top cabinet, he started wondering about the mood, too, "what happened with them?", he asked Charles' wife, "it seems my son thought he was smart enough to build the table without the instructions even though your daughter insisted on following them, and it lead to that", she pointed at the separated couple.

"She may get that stubbornness from me", Pierre mumbled, "and do you not think that Thomas has gotten that stubbornness from me and Charles either?", she chuckled, "knowing him, it will take him a bit to figure it out, but he'll apoligise, I'll make sure of it", she smiled. "I wouldn't put money down on Élodie not making him pay hard for it and earn it", he chuckled too, receiving the plates, "she knows where she stands, even if it is over some instructions".

(Thank you for submitting an ask 🤍)

[sweaterkittensahoy]

A Clever Trick That No Longer Works

I'm working on a pattern from Weldon's, which was an English company that produced sewing, knitting, and crochet patterns. I think they were an overall household brand that likely also did recipes and cleaning tips and that sort of thing.

One of the things they put out were pattern leaflets. But as Weldon's itself didn't MAKE yarn, they had to find a way to give an exact size for the patterns they wanted people to buy. This is an example of how they did that. They'd give a description of how much yarn was needed and what type, and then there'd be a little photo of the yarn laid out to show the actual thickness.

To match yarn, you'd lay it out against the example on the leaflet.

It's a very clever way to make sure people are using the right yarn when you can't be certain what yarn they're using and can't sell them your own line.

It does not, however, work in the modern day. This is from a scan of a leaflet that I got off etsy at some point. So, the exact layout and sizing of the original leaflet is lost, which means the exact scale of the yarn is lost, which means I assumed "dish cotton" was our old friend Lily's Sugar and Cream, and reader, it is not.

It appears for best results, you want a sportweight yarn. Which I learned by going down to a DK weight, making a set of sandals that are too big around my foot, and now I'm making a sportweight pair just to prove myself right.

But I mean, not like it's a hardship to make cute sandals. Look at them:

[dresden-syndrome]

20/VI-1963. Borovice, Středočeský region, People's Union Republic of Czechoslovakia, EESU.

"Hope no one saw me near the road to Prague. Just down the street and I'm already there... Gonna hide in the darker part..."

One thing Radím failed to notice.

Patrols.

He knew all the streets get guarded by Security patrols past curfew but who could predict the daily patrols from main streets finding him there, on the forgotten road near the forest, half an hour before? Could've expected the surveillance getting tougher after the riot two days ago. Better to be careful - those leaflets Radím brought from Prague are a recipe for disaster. For class 3 at least.

One split second - and the patrols rushed towards his side.

Another patrol group. They're out for him.

Heart pounding, beating, panicking loudly in the boy's chest. Every breath burns his throat. Then, a blinding flash of car lights. Nowhere to run.

Disoriented from the feeling of panic and lights staring into his face, Radím felt a rough, almost crushing grab on his neck and hands.

"Comrade Štušek, you're under arrest."

Radím tried to push around - first, second time - the officers' grip is so firm he couldn't even move. No, no, it can't be like that... It was only down the street...

"Let me go! I didn't do any...."

As the leaflets fell out, he realized there was no point to plead.

"...People of Czechoslovakia... the regime is only strong when we comply... down with Communist Party... down with EESU...", - a clear high-pitched voice read out loud, "Didn't do anything, you say, huh?"

Radím knew he's now seeing his hometown for the last time. It's all over.

"Goodbye", - he hissed, pushing and kicking in the air as the officers dragged him to the dreaded black car.

@whumpuary #1: Captivity (does capture count as captivity?) / Secret revealed

Art taglist: @painful-pooch @prismpanic @generic-whumperz @suspicious-whumping-egg @onlywhump @whumpedydump @whumpthefifth (if you wanna get in, let me know!!)

[forbiddenmoss]

Part 3

Sitting on the peer watching the twinkling stars ripple in the pond the farmer didn't hear someone walk up the peer. So lost in thought they barely noticed Shane sitting beside them. He sat in silence unsure what to say so instead he bumped his shoulder against the farmers and offered them a beer.

"you look like you could use this" how tempting it was to just drink the beer. Have one more night to enjoy and be free. The thought brought tears to their eyes. How long before things go back to normal? Will things go back to normal?

"sorry I can't..." Shane interrupted before he could hear the gentle sobs stuck in their throat

"ah not a drinker. That's good you don't want to end up like-"

"I'm pregnant"

That killed the conversation alright.

For the first time Shane didn't just look at the farmer he saw them. The tears in their eyes the lost expression. They seemed so far away trapped in the prison of their mind.

" ok ... So how do you feel about that?"

Harvey hadn't asked that. He'd congratulated them and started talking about pregnancy stuff. They zoned out and hadn't heard a word of it. Leaflets were crammed in their pockets but beyond that they knew nothing beyond the fact they were pregnant.

"I ... I don't know. I'm not in the right place to have a baby you've seen the farm so much still needs to be done and I've only just started to turn a profit I have so much work to do I don't see how a baby would fit in with my lifestyle."

"so don't have the baby"

The farmer pauses "but ... I kinda want a baby and I'm scared this might be my only chance to have a baby and I know I'm still young and that sounds crazy but I'm just so... Scared" the tears started to roll down their cheeks "nothing has gone to plan so far. I just ran away from everything I knew and now I'm a farmer. I don't know anything about farming."

"I didn't know anything about chickens till I came here" gulps down some beer "I didn't know anything about being a parent till I got Jaz either. It's tough at times I'll be honest"

"but that's different Jaz loves you you try your best and you're a good dad to her"

"yeah ... I'm not her dad"

"oh sorry I didn't mean to assume-"

"no no Jaz is my God daughter. I eh ... Her parents died one night. Car crash. It was raining the road was wet guess they couldn't break in time and-... Well... Died. I was looking after Jaz the night it happened and been with her ever since. That's why I'm here. I couldn't look after her. Can barely look after myself sometimes you know?" Taps the beer bottle and takes another drink "parents kicked me out when I was younger. Didn't want me back now I had a baby that didn't change anything. I'd lost my only two friends in the world and I was alone to raise a baby. Few months after Marnie found out and got a hold of me brought us here. Caroline knows lots of natural remedies and herbs to help with teething or sleeping or what ever issue I was having, robin would give us old toys and clothes had some really helpful books and Jodie was always having play dates and babysitting said it was good for Vincent and jaz to play together and Marnie made it all possible ... I guess what I'm trying to say is you're never truly alone. Even if it feels like it."

"that's nice but I can't just ask everyone to chip in and help me they don't know me I don't know them."

"don't you? you fish with Willie I know that means alot to him to have a fellow fisher. You don't judge Linus you give him your time and listen to him talk, Gus likes sending you new recipes and gets excited when you let him try what you made, you are helping Gunther fill the museum I've seen him in Pierres choosing thank you gifts asking what you'd like. You know us. Better than you think and we know you. As for asking them for help trust me you don't need to ask. They want to help they'll find away to help. I swear robin would just break in to renovate stuff for Jaz. Come home drunk to a mad woman in the kitchen sanding down the corners of the table. Almost scared me sober... Almost." Takes another drink.

"I don't even know if I want to keep it"

"it's ok if you don't. What ever choice you make is ok as long as it's the right choice for you. You don't need to have all the answers tonight. Either way you aren't alone"

"I feel like I've made so many mistakes what if this is another one? When I got here I was so rude to everyone how could they possibly like me? I just with I could start again."

" I know that feeling. I was rude to you when you first came here. Still don't know why you chose to be nice to me" he puts the bottle down and faces the farmer holding his hand out. "Hi I'm Shane. My pronouns are he him. I work at joja mart and i like chickens"

The farmer takes his hand "hi I'm Evie. My pronouns are she her. I work on the farm and I'm pregnant"

"well that's two things sorted tonight let's worry about the rest tomorrow" he leans back looking at the stars. The farmer follows his gaze watching night sky. It's so peaceful so beautiful her problems feel so far away and in this moment everything will be ok.

"yeah... Things will be ok. I'm not alone"

"and if you keep it even if the father doesn't help you have a whole village behind you, supporting you. You aren't alone"

The father.

"FUCK"

[il-mostrc]

Leaflets such as this were almost archaic in nature in the upper parts of Midgar and the bustling industry of Junon. They were usually deemed poor man's communication in an age where dinner parties and sessions were conducted by phone and other means directly linked to the leaps and bounds of technology. It was here that Dr. Lecter found himself accosted by the young man's (@enokvirkow) eagerness to share his wares.

Pointer and thumb gripped the paper at the base, noting the handwritten description photocopied by the numbers. The composition he held showed signs of mass production by faded ink, the stack already low by the time it reached his hands.

"Is that so?" Even if Hannibal was part of the top social elite in both Midgar and Junon, his curiosity in the culinary arts permitted him to cross the lines on what would dub the mastery of amateur. Some of the most sumptuous meals granted to him were from those who wouldn't grace his cocktail parties. Old recipes were brought from foreign lands, ones that remained in the memory of their ancestors, and not so much was written in culinary books to share.

"That is a tall order for someone as young as you." That's not to say he didn't believe him. Even in his youth, he was conquering the medical field by sketching the deceased for use in books with such intricate details that they admitted him to the field with a full ride. One could surely relay such skills, as he did, in the form of cuisine.

His jacket had been slung over his forearm, suit pressed with nary a flaw, as he switched his focus from the piece of paper to the young man. "Where do you cook these meals?" The lad didn't have the aroma of squalor; quite the opposite. Hannibal could detect spices that were otherwise rare in imports; they permeated off his clothing as well as the light musk of smoke—cookery smoke.

Often, his nose knows best. 

 Running a small foodstall came with the need of advertising. And while usually Enok did so by mouth-to-mouth, this time he had actually managed to throw together a flyer. Listing all the available meals from his home islands and promising an entirely new taste-experience with herbs from far away Galahd. That flyer was handed out to almost every poor person crossing the grinning youngster's path. Even in this aloof neighbourhood, he tried his luck. Holding out a flyer to an elegant man, of which he didn't know that he had a certain talent with cooking, too. Though their worlds and cuisines clashing here couldn't be any more different. Enok wasn't aware of any of that, of course. "Sir, I can guarantee you have never tasted anything like this before. Not even the fine restaurants around here can keep up with my specials! Would be happy to one day cook for you!"

[thelibraryghost]

1910s Cookery Books

Here is a sample of World War One-era cookbooks; more can be found at my blog.

Wartime cookery     Haskin, Frederic Jennings, comp. War Cook Book for American Women. Washington, DC: United States Food Administration, 1917.     Hill, Janet McKenzie. Economical War-Time Cook Book. New York, NY: George Cully & Company, 1918.     Hill, McKenzie Janet. War Time Recipes. Cincinnati, OH: The Proctor & Gamble Co., 1918.     Oldmeadow, Ernest. Home Cookery in War-Time. London: Grant Richards Ltd., 1915.     Snyder, Mrs. Sherwood P. Food Conservation and the Art of Home Canning. Binghamton, NY: Health Publishing Co., 1917.     Webber, Carolyn Putnam. Two Hundred and Seventy-Five War-Time Recipes. Bedford, MA: The Bedford Print Shop, 1918.     —. How to Save Eggs by Using Dr. Price's Cream Baking Powder. Chicago, IL: Royal Baking Powder Co., 1917.     —. United States Food Leaflet No. 5: Make a Little Meat Go a Long Way. Washington, DC: United States Department of Agriculture, 1917.     —. War Bread and Bread Crumb Recipes. Denton, TX: State College for Women, 1918.     —. Wheatless Recipes. New York, NY: Royal Baking Powder Co., 1918.

[transienturl]

dreamed that due to time machine shenanigans I was trapped on the crashing "titanic," which now that I am thinking about it while awake was, to the t, formatted as an escape room (I have never done an escape room). I mean, there was a contrived scifi setup, it was all puzzles. right before I woke up I was reading the highlighted words looking backward through a leaflet made of conveniently translucent paper about the different formulations of homemade explosive, trying to figure out which recipe was supposed to be appropriate to propel a (steampunk) time-machine-motorcycle along the surface of the water, which we needed to use to shoot @once-more-with-gravitas into the past-and-or-future as we determined that he (in a magician-audience-plant sort of way) was—despite being part of our group—factually already in both time periods and could feed information to "himself" to get us necessary information via setting up specific colored ropes, and we needed to have done that to close the time loop. I was yelling all of the ingredients I could find like cornmeal, nitroglycerine, etc. I did find a flipbook style pad of paper with holes to show parts of other pages and looked like it could reveal info but the "teacher" (was this a class trip?) was like uh actually you don't need that yet sorry (I guess this person was effectively the employee running the room). I think we had like 10 minutes or less before the ship crashed so I dunno if we would have made it; it felt like there was another section entirely after this one given the flipbook and what was probably another area beyond a bulkhead. the main issue imo seemed to be that only one person could fit in the area with all of the relevant stuff, at the part I woke up doing, which in retrospect I guess works for the dream, but we had like 7+ people and the rest of them were just milling around since they literally couldn't access anything which was stupid. it was very atmospheric though (I mean, being a dream instead of an escape room, it was much more able to be; earlier there was a scene transition that admittedly involved reality fading from one state to another which put everyone in midriff-deep rushing water). my current only idea was just to combine every ingredient, which seemed incorrect, but I was just about figuring out to read all of the highlighted words which were making a sentence so I bet that would have determined that bit; I think a lot of the mixing and processing equipment was puzzle gated though so we weren't super close to actually making the explosive yet

[zeroducks-2]

Zero, pls give me the strength to write a filth ass sladick fic. I’ve got the brain worms for one specific abo fic, and I stg, it’s all I can think about rn 😭 do u have any advice for me?? Writing? Motivation? Characterization? 🥺🙏

Of course!

Now I'm of the opinion that writing advice, ALL the writing advice you find online with no exception whatsoever, is totally useless. "Think of the characters this way!", "structure the plot that way!", "motivate yourself going by percentages!" etc - it's not that it's bad pieces of advice, in fact, they're all great suggestions. The issue with them is that creating a story has some technical aspects, but writing is unique to every person.

One of the billion writing advice floating around might be great for you, or maybe all of them work, but maybe not at single one is even vaguely useful, because how you approach writing is strictly personal so if they work on you or not is completely hit and miss.

Therefore what I can tell you is how I work, and maybe you'll find some compatible aspects and it can help you :)

Long post ahead!

Writing & Motivation:

MOST IMPORTANT. Talk about this with someone. DM your beloved mutual, hit your bestie up on discord, annoy me on anon, do whatever you need to talk about this fic. Talk about the plot, how the characters are supposed to be like, what should happen, what world building is in place, how the sex should pan out. "But people will be annoyed!" NO WE WON'T, I PROMISE. I love hearing people's ideas on their next fic, AU, revolutionary plot bunny. I love all of them and I'm not the only one. Talk to us about your fic!

Don't pick a specific time or moment of the day to start writing. You have 20 minutes and then your cousin will be there? It's alright, throw down 30 words in those minutes. You have two hours and you're afraid you'll get in too deep before the dentist appointment? I KNOW IT HURTS but when you're back from the dentist you might be tired, in pain, not motivated anymore. Write when you feel the itch, even on a leaflet with a permanent marker (I normally use my phone's notes if I have no choice). Don't wait for the right moment, the right moment can be any time you want it to be!

Don't plan a shitton of chapters. Plan just one, write that one. "But it's 1k and there isn't even smut!" It's still better than no chapter at all with 0k words isn't it? Write that scene, no matter how short it is. Once it's done admire it, look how beautiful it is. You want to write more now? Great, go ahead! You don't feel like going on with this? It might be time to share your little thing with someone on AO3, on tumblr or IRL! And if writing just that one little chapter satisfied you, that also is okay! Oh wait, you only know what to write for your sex scene, no context? Write that sex scene, the context is right there in your head. If you'll also want to write the context that's fantastic, but start by writing that scene you want to write, don't stress because you need to "get to it". Don't punish yourself with "I can write what I want to write only after 20k words of introduction", that's the perfect recipe to make you drop the fic.

Characterization

Don't be afraid that the characters might be OOC. I promise you no one cares, and the people who care won't click on an ABO fic which maybe is also a Feudal Japan AU with aliens. What matters is the impression of the characters. I'm writing one of the sections of my Omegaverse Royal AU at the moment, and I decided to make it Eobarry! But I have no idea how to write Eobard, he is a real challenge to me - I have an Eobard expert friend who gives me some advice, but still. He's a complex character with a rich history and there isn't much I can do to keep him IC, but the thing is... if I don't write this, there's simply going to be less Eobarry fics to go around. Better if there's one more, even if it's not up to whatever imaginary standard I set with myself, than one less.

Don't be afraid to make the characters act a certain way because it's convenient. This is the exact opposite advice I give when people are writing non-transformative work: When you're writing a story, once you decide that a character is afraid of spiders you need to stick with it and make them afraid of spiders forever, they can't be afraid of spiders only for 1 scene. This does not count for fanfictions. Fanfictions exist for us to have fun, be horny, feel a whole lot of emotions and fulfill the desire to chew on our blorbos like they were squeaky toys. So you want Dick to be afraid of spiders in this fic? It never happened in canon...? Who gives a shit, he is now afraid of spiders. You want to make Slade very good at playing marbles? Cool, he is now a champion marble player for your fic and your fic only. And it doesn't matter if the characters are not consistent and "fall in love too quickly", or if "the sex is not realistic", or if "they should get pregnant like this", or if "there's no way they'd be alright with this situation". None of this crap, nobody gives a damn. You're writing to have fun, not to win a literary prize.

You might write A LOT and then realize you are absolutely unsatisfied with how the story went, because a character did something which set them on a course that you ended up not liking. It's fine! Go back to where the choice was taken and split the fic! Coincidentally, it's something I am doing with my Omegaverse Royal AU (the Sladick part) because I decided I wanted it darker :)

And remember, it's okay to be inspired by other fics. If you take something precisely off another fic you might want to ask permission because it's the polite thing to do, but if for example you find that you write Alpha Slade with a scar on his mating gland because you read that in my fic, that's totally okay! We continuously get inspired by each other, and my beloved writer friends know that I take inspiration from their things! (indeed my Omegaverse Royal AU, because apparently it's the perfect example for everything today, was inspired by the amazing works of anawrites and TheSubtextIs, with their Conflict Resolution and Conquered by Love).

Reach out if you need help, or if you want more specific advice that might be 100% useless! Cheers :D

[clochanamarc]

also aisling definitely does the trick or treating, like, the kids go out to parties or they take advik trick or treating, and aisling makes pumpkin cookies and decorates the house and the diner for the halloween party and she sets out bowls of candy and little recipe leaflets for any curious parents/guardians taking their kids out. but most of her time is spent preparing the diner and the outdoor dining area for the halloween party that they all host every year for the neighboring blocks. so this is a really round-about way of saying "u can like this post if you want to be tagged in a starter where ur muse is helping aisling set up for the halloween party"!

[najia-cooks]

Lemon balm shortbread cookies

Lemon balm (Melissa officinalis), a commonly foraged plant in the mint family, gives a lightly herbacious, bright lemon flavor to these shortbread cookies. They have a classic, crisp, sandy shortbread texture; optional poppy seeds add crunch and a mild nutty flavor. The lemon balm and poppy seeds may be swapped out for any combination of herbs, spices, or citrus zest that your heart desires.

These cookies are subtly sweet and very dunkable, making them perfect companions to a cup of tea or coffee.

Recipe under the cut!

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Lemon balm has square stems and opposite leaves (two leaves per node on opposite sides of the stem). Leaves are simple (one leaf blade with no leaflets); ovate and slightly heart-shaped, with scalloped edges; slightly glossy; thin, soft, and hairy; and deeply veined. They are emerald green on the top, and a lighter greyish green on the underside. They have a lemony scent and an oily texture when crushed. Stems and petioles (leaf stalks) are covered in small standing hairs.

Ingredients:

120g (1/2 cup + 1 Tbsp) salted non-dairy margarine, softened

60g (1/3 cup) caster or granulated sugar

180g (1 1/2 cups) AP flour

1/4 cup (8.5g) minced lemon balm

1 tsp poppy seeds (optional)

Like most traditional shortbread, this recipe follows a 1:2:3 ratio of sugar:butter:flour (by weight). Any herbs, spices, citrus zest, etc. of your choosing may be added to that base.

You could replace the caster sugar with powdered sugar if you want a melt-in-your-mouth texture, rather than a typical crumbly shortbread texture.

Instructions:

Cream margarine with an electric beater for 30 seconds, until it has a whipped texture. Add lemon balm and sugar and beat for another 3 minutes or so, until a couple shades lighter in color (this means that you have incorporated enough air).

Add the flour and mix well with a wooden spoon; then press with your hands to form into a ball.

Roll the dough out into a cylinder. You can make the cylinder more regular by placing it on a piece of wax or parchment paper, then folding the parchment paper over; use a ruler or the flat of a knife to force the cylinder of dough back into the folded edge of the paper.

Wrap the dough by twisting the ends of the parchment paper around, like a candy wrapper. Chill the dough for at least an hour, to keep the cookies from spreading in the oven by allowing the flour to absorb liquid.

Using a sharp paring knife, cut the cylinder of dough into slices about 1/4" thick. Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper, about 1/2" apart.

Bake at 350 °F (180 °C), in the top third of your oven, for 8 to 10 minutes. For chewier cookies, bake just until the center of the top and bottom of the cookie is no longer wet-looking; for crisper ones, bake until the edges are just starting to turn a light golden color.

[tabletoptrinketsbyjj]

Trinkets, Books, 11: An eclectic library of dusty tomes, fictional textbooks, pocketbooks, paperbacks, hardcovers, booklets, leaflets and magical manuals. Paper leaves and the binding surrounding them can help define a character, kick off a subplot, fuel a fetch quest or simply serve as a generic macguffin. Commonly seen in video games such as Baldur’s Gate, Neverwinter Nights, World of Warcraft and Skyrim, book items are a way to subtly world build while still handing out sellable loot. A wizard has a spellbook, a cleric has a holy text and now you have a trinket list.

Malcom's Maladies: An autobiography originally intended as a tongue-in-cheek but informative guide to clerics and healers on dealing with social diseases, halfway through the process of writing a massive plague broke out. The writer, Malcolm, had to go from tending to the needs of a half dozen brothels to being the last cleric still alive in a city in dire peril. While he did his best to maintain his sense of humor, the subject matter and the jokes grow increasingly dark, and if you manage to laugh during the chapter discussing proper mass grave preparation you should probably seek therapy.

A heavily annotated recipe book of foreign cuisine.

A Hundred-One Candles: A short book that according to its inner binding, was originally a police report compiled by an officer of the Fortenshire Watch gifted with unusually sharp literary skills. Permission was later given to the officer to publish her work under a pseudonym. It is a recording of the contents of and investigative proceedings surrounding a home in the ancient canal-quarter of Sorelle, one suspected of housing a so-called "warlock." It begins with eyewitness reports of the strange comings and goings from that house's door at midnight, the lights inside, the terrible cries from its attic. It ends with a recounting of the building's interior following the obtainment of a raid warrant. Terrible sights were found inside. Most notably: A man’s body surrounded by a hundred and one red candles, its pores filled completely with the gestating chrysalises of strange moths.

A blank spellbook, its cover being of a pearly, scaled hide bound in black iron and with both lock and key attached by linen threads.

Lairs and Back Again: A damaged paperback that appears to be the autobiography of an unknown halfling and his career working as a freelance thief for a company of dwarfs. The majority of the text is a rather dull list of complaints about the working conditions, the lack of food, and the shoddy pay he initially received, but there is some useful information regarding the opening of secret doors.

A guidebook written by Yug Emos called "How To Train Mimics And Animate Armor", the starting phrase being "So you have found a tame mimic suitable for training…". At no point did it tell you how to obtain a mimic and assumed that you already knew how to carve ancient runes using long lost techniques into armor.

A leather-bound book, filled with pages of rough parchment. Each page contains what seems to be an attempt at a love poem. Each and every single attempt by the author at crafted a romantic prose is horrendous, bordering on criminally awful.

Nock, Draw, Loose! An Archer's Field Manual: A rustic book that depicts how to properly craft and fire a bow as well as fletch your own arrows. The manual assumes that the reader has access to nothing but a sharp blade and includes detailed instructions for every step of the process.

A medium-sized plain black leather-bound book, with the title “Party Jokes” pressed into the cover. The text is a weird mix of humorous anecdotal stories, one liners and the occasional funny illustration. None of the jokes are particularly new or funny but a PC fluent in Thieves Cant will be able to see that they are meant to disguise the actual content of the book which outlines numerous methods, tips and schemes for running illicit but nonviolent scams, frauds and confidence jobs.

A small booklet depicting the hand gestures employed in casting spells. It is a useful reference for those interesting in practicing magic themselves or those who work as guards, security or covert operatives who should be well-practiced at spotting mages. The preface says that copies of it can be ordered from the major printer of any large city.

—Click Here to be directed to the Hotlinks To All Tables post, which provides (As you might have guessed) convenient links to all of the loot and resource tables this blog has.

—Click Here for additional Book Descriptions to give these objects even more personality.

—Keep reading for 90 more books.

—Note: The previous 10 items are repeated for easier rolling on a d100.

Malcom's Maladies: An autobiography originally intended as a tongue-in-cheek but informative guide to clerics and healers on dealing with social diseases, halfway through the process of writing a massive plague broke out. The writer, Malcolm, had to go from tending to the needs of a half dozen brothels to being the last cleric still alive in a city in dire peril. While he did his best to maintain his sense of humor, the subject matter and the jokes grow increasingly dark, and if you manage to laugh during the chapter discussing proper mass grave preparation you should probably seek therapy.

A heavily annotated recipe book of foreign cuisine.

A Hundred-One Candles: A short book that according to its inner binding, was originally a police report compiled by an officer of the Fortenshire Watch gifted with unusually sharp literary skills. Permission was later given to the officer to publish her work under a pseudonym. It is a recording of the contents of and investigative proceedings surrounding a home in the ancient canal-quarter of Sorelle, one suspected of housing a so-called "warlock." It begins with eyewitness reports of the strange comings and goings from that house's door at midnight, the lights inside, the terrible cries from its attic. It ends with a recounting of the building's interior following the obtainment of a raid warrant. Terrible sights were found inside. Most notably: A man’s body surrounded by a hundred and one red candles, its pores filled completely with the gestating chrysalises of strange moths.

A blank spellbook, its cover being of a pearly, scaled hide bound in black iron and with both lock and key attached by linen threads.

Lairs and Back Again: A damaged paperback that appears to be the autobiography of an unknown halfling and his career working as a freelance thief for a company of dwarfs. The majority of the text is a rather dull list of complaints about the working conditions, the lack of food, and the shoddy pay he initially received, but there is some useful information regarding the opening of secret doors.

A guidebook written by Yug Emos called "How To Train Mimics And Animate Armor", the starting phrase being "So you have found a tame mimic suitable for training…". At no point did it tell you how to obtain a mimic and assumed that you already knew how to carve ancient runes using long lost techniques into armor.

A leather-bound book, filled with pages of rough parchment. Each page contains what seems to be an attempt at a love poem. Each and every single attempt by the author at crafted a romantic prose is horrendous, bordering on criminally awful.

Nock, Draw, Loose! An Archer's Field Manual: A rustic book that depicts how to properly craft and fire a bow as well as fletch your own arrows. The manual assumes that the reader has access to nothing but a sharp blade and includes detailed instructions for every step of the process.

A medium-sized plain black leather-bound book, with the title “Party Jokes” pressed into the cover. The text is a weird mix of humorous anecdotal stories, one liners and the occasional funny illustration. None of the jokes are particularly new or funny but a PC fluent in Thieves Cant will be able to see that they are meant to disguise the actual content of the book which outlines numerous methods, tips and schemes for running illicit but nonviolent scams, frauds and confidence jobs.

A small booklet depicting the hand gestures employed in casting spells. It is a useful reference for those interesting in practicing magic themselves or those who work as guards, security or covert operatives who should be well-practiced at spotting mages. The preface says that copies of it can be ordered from the major printer of any large city.

Dark Trap: A book of madness that tells from a broken first-person narrative, of a lone gnome’s struggle to survive in an evil, subterranean land. He does eventually emerge from the depths, but he leaves his sanity behind.

Burden Distributed: A squarish brown book produced by the Teamsters Union. Extremely plain, unentertaining, but filled with unrivaled wisdom on the packing and tackling of beasts of burden. The book itself has lug-rings built into its spine, presumably for ease of carriage.

The Book of Screams: A normal looking leather-bound tome of about 50 sheets of vellum. A perceptive PC will become aware after a brief investigation that the leather binding is made of the skin of a human. Upon opening, the stretched leather face of the source of the leather is revealed on the inner cover. It immediately begins screaming in torment as though it were being stripped from the body it originated from. The screaming persists as long as the book is open. The vellum pages appear to be made from the same skin as the binding, although skived so thin as to be translucent. Closing the book muffles the screams. The screaming ceases one minute after the book is closed.

The Magic Mirror: A book that describes a soul trapping mirror and its concepts in exquisite detail, making the claim that the reason a mirror is the best vehicle for trapping souls is because it is beheld by the eyes, which are the most direct route to the soul. The inner back cover is mirrored, and currently has an ancient wisp of a soul still trapped inside, the presence of which is barely detectable: whispers, or a strange wavering while looking in said mirror, perhaps a feeling of being watched.

A green-leather bound volume with gold inlaid symbols on the spine and cover. The book only opens when exposed to moonlight revealing it to be a druidic research journal. It contains detailed drawings and notes of various wild creatures and goes into lengthy detail of how it feels to be transformed into such a creature and the benefits of that form. Druids and other mages who are capable of polymorphing magics find the journal an excellent source in regards to making the best use out of an animal's form.  

The King in Yellow: A small hardback with a sickly yellow linen cover, the book is a play taking place in the lost city of Carcosa, revolving around three masked party-goers: Camilla, Cassilda, and The Stranger. Reading the first act has no effects, but the second act begins with the unmasking of The Stranger, and reveals truths so maddening that the reader takes some amount of mental stress and, after feverishly reading the entire play, feels compelled to pass it on to some unsuspecting person who hasn't read it yet. If this is person happens to live in a large population center, the PC’s may notice a new cult spring up around the cosmic revelations the book grants, worshiping The King in Yellow and waiting for his return.

Famous Magical Battles and Duels, A Critical Analysis: A historical reference book that contains extensive and detailed descriptions of some of the most famous cases of magical warfare. These conflicts range from singular duels between two mages, legendary contests of skill and honor between rival wizard academies to brutal wars of domination where battle sorcerers augmented their own natural abilities through occult pacts and blood rituals to be able to decimate thousands of soldiers with nothing more than a snap of their fingers. Despite the engaging subject matter it is written in rather monotone and dull manner.

Illithid, Aboleth, and other Aberration Behaviors: A simple scroll describes behaviors of aberrant creatures, such as feeding habits and mating rituals. However almost immediately after reading it, the information seems to leave the reader’s mind and he can only remember the title of the scroll.

Immutable Principles, Defining "First Level" Spells: A thick tomb documenting the history of spell complexity for a series of spells. The anonymous author argues certain specific keys are shared among spells that define their complexity and power, which are noted as a number. Every chapter is structured by breaking down a single popular spell, identifying the keys shared among most wizards discoveries. These correlations are summarized in chapter conclusions and theorize that no matter how unique the study or writing of a spellbook is, a spell is actually the use of fixed set of principles created by Arcane Deities. The anonymous author is rumored to be a Lich, as comparison of different "Level" books shows influence of various cultures throughout the ages.

A chapbook of Random Humanoid poetry with a wooden cover.

Controlling the Battlefield With Magic: A thick tome going into great detail on the subject of supernatural combat theory. It covers everything from the direct combat spells, ranged bombardment and offensive curses to the protective spells that enhance, heal or shield your allies and combat multipliers such as creating temporary fortifications, summoning creature to fight in your stead, teleportation and using the terrain to your advantage.

A large tome with the rambling writings of a madman.

Lady Katerina; Love is War: An illustrated novel that is prime example of spell caster using charm to influence each other to make them do anything. In this case Lady Katerina and Lord Sherlock are using their magic to make other person confess their love to them and subject themselves as their vassal while Cella Fagellita realm’s famous merchant are clueless about this battle. It is praised that the illustration on the inside cover show the correct Vocal tone and Somatic movement that make the spell as effective as possible.

A rare religious holy text of a minor Goddess of Random Domain containing a number of significant misprints.

A bootleg quarto of Vittoria Wolfsheart’s plays; The Thirteen Torments of Jacqueline Chandler, The Scarabs, The Miscreation, The Inquisition of Wolves, and The Gibbous Prince. The copies are poorly transcribed, riddled with errors and incomplete speeches.

A child's diary that talks about "Things under her bed".

A book of poems, Six-Sided Satire, ruthlessly skewering Hexian culture and politics in perfect dactylic hexameter, the traditional meter of heroic Hexian epic. The text portrays Hex as a city of pompous intellectual parasites and thieves, feasting vulture-like on the ruins of older cultures, appropriating their knowledge as their own, and then condescendingly lecturing other states and peoples about the virtues of Hexian “free-thought” and “innovation.” The text is anonymously authored.

The Forge: A book about the Infernal Forge and the magical weapons that have been forged there such as The Xan-Axe. Whilst the book was published legally, the government insists that the exact location of the Forge remains a secret, to prevent people trying to create unauthorized magical weapons and hurting themselves and others, and to stop the secret services of other nations attempting to use, destroy or steal it. The Forge is the only known source for magical weapons in the entire country where it is located.

Katriona's Time Among the Felines: A cloth bound book that tells a tale of a young adult who chooses to consort with a clowder of felines, and terrifying and fantastical things happen; but the anonymous author of the text makes no discernment if the tale is true or not. It warns of a Great Danger That May Be Avoided, but does not tell how such catastrophe may come about. Stuffed inside one of the leaves of the work is a small press-board square with several holes cut in it that align with some of the words on the page, as if used in some sort of code or cipher.

The Chronicles of Wayfinder: A journal from the late seldarine drow bard Vuhrak Wayvinder. Detailing his exploits and adventures with various parties as they journeyed through the overworld as well as the underdark. The book goes into great detail of various paths and puzzles through various dungeons and areas of the underdark written in vuhraks own hand. It also details various songs rhymes and drawings detailing his adventures. It is also rumored to detail through rhyming puzzle the locations of hidden stashes of various treasures Vuhrak was unable to carry with him.

The First Men: A historical reference book about the ancient culture and society of the long vanished First Men, but the last chapter is called Barrows of The First Men and says where the tombs of the Kings and nobles of the First Men are to be found and the right rituals and times to use to dig into them and reach the Dreaming Worlds inside them, and as such as a useful item for adventurers to have. Whilst the actual barrows have long since been looted and contain just old bones and pieces of pottery, the Dreaming Worlds still have much to offer if they can be successfully entered.

Rings and Things: A book about magical jeweler, it contains the details of 30 Rings and such rare artifacts as The Crown of the Storm. It also has a helpful chapter about Gemstone Magic and how to cast it, and another chapter about the dangers of the Gems of the Underworld as not all jewels and gemstones are safe for humanoids and the living to use. A must have for everybody interested in jeweler.

Codex of Leaves: A strange book made from bound wood and leaves details countless varieties of flora. It is written in Druidic.

Dwelling of the Ancients: A tome written in Dwarven that provides in depth but hyper-specific information on ancient ruins and inscriptions. Considered a definitive treatise on the subject of ancient civilizations and ruins, this book documents how several ancient cultures constructed their buildings and offers translations of several famous inscriptions found therein. The book, written by acclaimed antiquarian Naniel ibn-Nurth, also provides a short section on ancient scripts and languages, which can be quite helpful when attempting to decipher similar writings.

Necronomicon: A thick tome, heavy and cold, bound in dark, stained leather. Wherever the material came from, it feels too thin and elastic to make for effective binding. The grimoire is a repository of occult summoning rituals written in a prose that seems purposely obtuse, perhaps to weed out lesser practitioners of the dark arts. An excerpt of the tome reads as follows "...then say the words of Sealing - "Shem serep pftoss mavo igerso! Baiaf! Igerso!" - and kneel before the circles. Bow to them and pray thusly: The One All-Uniting who dwells in the dark, In the center of all Things you sleep, And may this darkness be dense forever, So no one see the glare of your Eye! And lo, the Thing will rouse and answer you..."

The Book of Dagon: An old damp book that contains information regarding a being known as Dagon, who will be familiar to knowledgeable PC's as a Great Old One, an aberrant deity who lives below the waves of the deep sea. The book is a translation, and a rough draft at that, littered with footnotes and corrections. Detailed inside are the rituals of Dagon's servants, including summoning and sacrifice, are intermixed with other advice. One dictates the proper breeding with humans so as to grow the Deep One's numbers. An excerpt from that section reads as follows; "Bring the slaves on the shore in the hour of high moon. Cut the skin in the lines of unholy names of Neshiartnam and Nsarag Amalkhassit, and mix their blood with sand in a pit. Place the dolphin's eye within and say thrice: "Ya Uztumem Krhash Ahaog Raa, Kev, Kev!" Let the slaves fall and crawl in the waters and direct your prayers to the watching eye of out Master."

Boatinomics 101: A well-bound book with water-stained pages inside, yet the ink on those pages appear unaffected. This simple guide provides straightforward advice to novice sailors on how to pilot and perform light maintenance on small sea vessels. It has an entire chapter on what to look for when inspecting a ship before booking passage on it or purchasing her. A reader who commits the instructions to memory may have a leg up during negotiations the price of a waterborne passage or an entire vessel.

Criminal Minds; Waterdeep: A soft-cover novel that contains a fictional mystery story based within Waterdeep. The protagonist is a brilliant but troubled investigator who is accompanied by a rotating cast of eccentric assistants.

Dr. Flatmantle's Guide to Combat Medicine: A blood-stained pamphlet that describes the location of key blood vessels in various creatures and methods of temporarily mending wounds without the use of magic. The techniques have a heavy focus on quickly stabilizing the patient so that they can be moved to a location where long term medical care can be administered.

From Urchin to Merchin': A small, black hard-bound book that can easily fit in a hidden pocket. This tome contains detailed notes on methods of upselling and negotiation.

History of the Realms; The North: An encyclopedia of sorts that seems to be part of larger series of books; it has detailed accounts of the northern kingdoms, landscapes, and people of import.

Maelsturth's Manual of Mammalian Beasts: A thick tome with a metal-wrought clasp to keep it shut, this book's pages contain forbidden occult instructions on the temporary conversion of one's form into that of a mammalian beast.

So You Want a Revolution?: A palm sized book bound in bright red cloth. The contents are famously outlawed in three different kingdoms, as the text details the ins and outs of seeding dissent, inciting riots and overthrowing political regimes.

The Archmage's Almanac, 11th Edition: A hard-cover book, many of whose pages are tattered and stained, this almanac details magical curiosities discovered and arcane experiments performed over a century ago.

The Key Master; A Life of Locks: A medium tome with a ribbon book mark attached to its spine. The book contains detailed sketches of a number of locks, their accompanying mechanisms and how to create, repair and unlock them.

Time Tested Tricks of Tongue Fighting: A tome familiar to many bards, this small hardcover book contains various quips and insults one can use in arguments.

About the Art of Fighting: A heavy tome bound in thick leather, its corners reinforced with heavy steel fittings. The pages are relatively rough parchment, to better withstand time and use, written in the clear handwriting of a dwarf. The book is lavishly illustrated with diagrams of stances and guards, bearing the images of differently armed warriors of great renown on their first pages. The manual contains the necessary exercises and teachings to learn to fight in any combat style from style from Archery to Zui Quan.

Awakening Your Inner Empath: A small, soft-cover book with insights into interpreting body language and facial expressions to better understand the emotions of common type of humanoids.

Abyssal Bestiary: Reams of paper held together by string and browned by the passage of time. Inside are drawings of and details on a number of eldritch “creatures”. The details mainly relate to how you may kill, injure or otherwise protect yourself from the beasts. The information contained within these pages may well come to save your live, if you are so unlucky as to encounter some of these beasts for yourself.

Old Diary: A dusty, but ornate red journal, bound in gold. A cursory glance through the pages reveals it to be the diary of a summoner. The diary is filled with information on the various creatures of the abyss and details on how to summon them. Minor creatures may be easier to summon, greater creatures may require specific conditions, grander summoning circles, or greater sacrifices. How the reader may come to actually controlling the beasts, the old book neglects to tell.

The Scripture of Law: A book bound in black leather with the rising sun symbol embossed in gold. It contains a religious text written by early disciples of the god Darlen.

The Barber‐Surgeon’s Manual of Trimming, Bloodletting and Teeth Pulling, with Illustrations: A well-read instructional manual bound in patchwork leather written by Mustafa Al‐Murai.

A handwritten journal containing detailed accounts of Tarrin Longstrider’s wanderings in the Tangled Wood. The book is bound in weather-stained brown leather and has seen much use.

A small handbook bound in white silk with gold tooling, purple ribbon, entitled “Countess Ludmilla’s Guide to Proper Behavior at Court for Ladies and Gentlemen”

A travel handbook bound in green goblin-hide and decorated with spidersilk entitled “Oglander Trell’s Guide to the Seelie and Unseelie Courts”. Perusing the guide provides the reader with knowledge about the intricacies of the fey courts and the basics on how not to disastrously embarrass oneself or cause great offence to the fair folk.

The Enlightened Wisdom of the Imans of the Crescent Moon: A sandalwood box marked with moon symbol and containing four fragile scrolls. The parchments contain handwritten religious texts from the southern city of Sabtah.

A magnificent painted papyrus scroll covered in hieroglyphics, illustrating the life of Queen Meritamon of Khemet.

Pirates of the Wine Dark Seas: A bound collection of far‐fetched pirate tales, wrapped in sea serpent‐skin and studded with pearls.

The Philosopher’s Stone: A book whose leather cover is marked with multicolored stains. Its pages contain extensive handwritten alchemical notes written Thadeous Glimfinger.

A beautifully illuminated psalter containing the teachings of Saint Barteas of Darlen. The book contains instructions on how a faithful layperson might break curses and cleanse desecrated ground.

Flora and Fauna of the Coral Sea: A bestiary and naturalist’s guide covering the monsters, animals and plants above and below the waves. The text is bound with wooden covers and decorated with bits of coral.

A dark green board-bound book with black Gnomish lettering entitled “On Envenomations”. The text focuses entirely on poisons, toxins and venoms and how to apply them to various traps and weapons.

A book entitled “Illustrated Sports” with a burgundy cover, illustrated with images of members of various races exercising. Every time you look back at the book, their poses shift.

A dark green, almost black book whose spine is decorated with a detailed depiction of a hideous tentacle. Entitled “Outsiders: An Illustrated Bestiary” The book falls open at a page discussing an entity known as Miraxia, and the pages then refuse to be turned.

A narrow volume with a puce cover and dark red lettering on the spine spelling out “Eternity”. The book vanishes instantly when a new reader opens it. 3d4 hours later it reappears among the reader’s possessions, filled with florid poetry dedicated to their first love.

A bloodstained folio that details accounts of favors owed, debts paid and deals made. A character who speaks the secretive cant of rogue's or has a background of criminal connections a written contract from an organized thieves guild.

A small pocket book filled with names each written with different handwriting. The names don’t seem to have any theme to them and very in gender, racial and cultural background. Traditional dwarven names tend to be written in dwarvish runes, female names with slightly more delicate handwriting, etc. If heat or a mild acid is applied to the pages, a series of various criminal activities (Such as burglar, enforcer, fence, forger, killer smuggler, ect) and vague addresses (Such as “The long alley between Sal’s general store and Sylvia’s Scissors) where they could be found. A knowledgeable PC can determine that all of the addresses can be found in the nearest large city.

A small leather notebook which contains extensive firsthand notes relating to celestial beings, their culture and their language.

Black Lotus Manual: An oblong tome covered in tan hide. Burnt into the cover are black lotus flowers and red Khitani characters. The volume contains descriptions of and lore about deadly plants and venomous creatures as well as the effects and symptoms of their toxins. Penned by the Sifu of the Khitani Black Lotus cabal, this tome is both reviled for its dark knowledge and illegal in most areas of the Known Lands, including the Khitani Empire.

The Cold Harbor Diary: A small, bloodstained, leather-bound book, filled with notes written by a northern soldier during the last civil war. Despite being made over a hundred years ago, it looks almost new. The pages are a uniform cream, the blood on the cover barely dry. The entries begin cheerfully, but become increasingly nihilistic and distraught as the diary goes on. The final entry is uncharacteristically short and to the point: “June 3. Cold Harbor. I was killed.”

A picture book with seemingly no story, only vivid illustrations of children running in the woods. Flipping back and forth reveals that the children seem to move when not watched, and there’s something they’re running from...

Architecture Fantastic: A well worn leather tome describing the fantastic structures built by mages. Within its pages are numerous interesting chapters such as; It's Bigger On The Inside! How To Get Your Floating Castle Off The Ground, How Not To Sink The 8-Ball In Your Pocket Dimension, Animated Structures; Cruising Saloons Not Moving Cartoons, Teleportation And You; How Not To Land In A Volcano, And Building On Enormous Creatures; Living On The Back Of A Giant Turtle.

A pocketbook of the local laws and regulations of the nearest large city. It is well dogeared and according to an inscription on the inside of the first page was owned by a member of the city guard known as “Corporal Bruno Miron”

A large sketchbook which is packed with detailed illustrations of various monsters, of which only some are from the region you find the book it.

A book bound in blue cloth containing myths and stories used to memorize the locations and constellations of important stars.

A cookbook written in Goblin titled “Cooking With Garbage”. Several pages have been torn from the chapter on desserts.

An old book which details a ritual called “Mending the Broken heart”.

A wanderer's waybook written by Jerval Sekara entitled “From Interesting Places and Tedious People”. The book contains a surprisingly large amount of good strategies for lone travelers and small parties to follow in order to see wonderful sights without being caught up in local politics, irrelevant gossip and small time questing.

The Chain: A small travel book of Hell Knight philosophy that encourages discipline through trial, whether such tests involve memorizing and meditating upon the Measure or exposing oneself to stress and pain that threaten to break the weak. At its more philosophical level, the Chain concerns itself with three virtues: order, discipline, and mercilessness.

Nuldy’s Compendium of Insect Inquiries: A strange book containing hundreds of pages of unique insects that any capable reader would believe do not actually exist. The text is written with such a knowledgeable factual prose along with detail anatomical sketches that it is hard to completely disregard the book as total garbage. An excerpt from a random page reads as follows: “In many regions of the civilized-yet-recluse world, communities are well acquainted with the infamous folklore of the Dung Beetle. These timid insects incite fear in commoners—they are a deadly infestation—and adventurers. Amassing large hoards of refuse, these beetles possess the innate magic to set dung on fire and fling it with amazing accuracy. Small explosions immediately follow something being hit by one of these flaming dung balls. A single Dung Beetle is manageable, but where there is one, there are said to be many more, and a swarm is a curse. Best to give this beetle plenty of space and keep your latrine clean.”

A chapbook entitled: “Whip It Good: A Life In Service to Lovitar". The introduction written by Abdirak, a worshiper of Goddess of Agony reads as follows; “The Maiden of Pain, Loviatar, teaches us that pain is a most powerful and sacred sensation. And should our pain delight her (Should we embrace such a gift) she will grant her most sacred of blessings.”

Magisterium Magicka: A thick, dry tome concerning the rights of wizards to pass on their knowledge and to choose which students they should accept for tutelage. The writing is highly defensive, as if the wizard in question had spent quite a lot of time being told that he should either never teach or that he should teach anyone who shows interest.

A musty encyclopedia that was originally penned in a legendary and long burned library.

The Mechanus Operations Manual: An incredibly heavy tome bound in steel with pages made of solid metal. It is presumed to be an artifact stolen from the Lawful plane of Mechanus and contains the ultimate instructions to control and maintain the entire realm, including its inhabitants. Unfortunately, the manual is written in a form of highly technical slang unknown to most non-inhabitants of Mechanus. Its precise attention to detail makes the text so large and uninteresting that none so far have managed to complete a reading of the text.

Dark Heart; The Lore of Life: A comprehensive tome designed to teach budding necromancers their first incantations to bring the dead back to life. The book starts off small, such as bringing small rodents back to life, and ultimately works up to bringing back dead family members.

Call of the Void: A strange tome written in an unknown language. Attempting to read it causes headaches and dizziness. If magically translated, it describes an elder god that lives in the void between stars, and methods to worship and communicate with it.

The Ballad of the Laughing King: A nihilistic tome detailing the personal account of an eccentric former adventurer calling themselves the Ebon Jester. Other than this book, there is no record of him existing. The book claims that the world and all those within it are simply constructs formed from the thought of a single all-powerful individual: the Laughing King. In the final chapters it alludes to the possibility of several creatures who may be free of the King’s direct influence, and the descriptions given eerily match the descriptions of the party’s PCs. While the Laughing King is not physically described, their personality and mannerisms are hinted at enough that insightful PC’s will understand that they are the DM.

GLORIOUS OOZE: A leather-bound book that is covered in a green, sticky ooze. If you can get the pages unstuck, they describe the teachings and tenants of Uur'glaz-lop, the Sinister God of Slime.

Spreading Joy: A religious tome made by a God of disease and plagues. The volume contains various rituals and spells for inflicting diseases of various levels of lethality and infectiousness.

The Ilyea'n Grimoire: A strange compendium of lore, poetry and incantations. The pages, most of which are of a parchment that is rough and unsettling to the touch and appear to its reader to be entirely blank. It is only when the reader cuts themselves and drips blood on the pages that the words are revealed; and much blood is required to read the whole thing. Knowledgeable PC’s are aware that according to occult lore, many are the foolish who have expired from self exsanguination or cumulative trauma in order to 'read just one more page' ...

Codex of the Anointed: A bound manuscript that's not so much written as tattooed on a thin, fine parchment of undetermined origin. Written in an (As-yet) undecipherable language by an unknown author, it is decorated with images that sometimes squiggle between the lines and sometimes stretch over a two-page spread. The images depict vile scenes of mutilation, murder, and ritual sacrifice. Examining it for more than an hour at a time provokes severe headaches with strange sensory effects, including coronas of burning light, flittering shadows of many-limbed creatures, and the pervasive smell of burning flesh.

Dreams: An ornate golden case containing a long single page scroll, made of papyrus that if examined, introduces the reader to the concept of ascension through meditation and study. The author believed that all of existence is a dream and that the gods are simply individuals that, like lucid dreamers, can manipulate the dream. Some say this scroll was written by an evil god to lure people in their grasp. Others believe these teachings were banned by the church because the gods want no further competition.

The Underworld Bartender: A recipe book of dangerous, distasteful, and downright disgusting cocktails. From the Beholder Blood Bellini to a hot rum toddy served in a human skull, this has it all. Recipes are interspersed with edgy, and questionably plausible, tales of high crime.

The Chronicler’s Book: A faded green book, thick, and of a skewed geometry: five unequal sides, bound in a spiral along one short edge. The cover appears to be made of a rough leather. Touching the book (While trying not to think about its eerie geometry or the nature of the leather in which it is bound), one senses the presence of a powerful, alien intelligence.

A severely dog-eared arcane volume entitled “When the Dawning Light Strips the Fat From Beneath My Arms, the Gate That is Not a Gate is Eroded Open for One-Who-Is-Now-None to Seep Through Eyes Within Eyes”. The text is nothing but a rambling, incoherent string of word salad that is nonetheless a practical guide to interplanar travel. By strictly following the bizarre sequences of meaningless actions and chanting the meandering chapters-long verses, the reader will find themselves on another plane. The technique fails to transport the book itself, stranding the reader unless they've committed the entire text to memory.

A heft manual filled with banned alchemical formulas and heretical arcane fleshwarping techniques, entitled “Chimaeramancy”. The author (Damo Krail) was a vile mage obsessed with creating the ultimate beast. The text describes how to create chimeras via a clearly outlined and easy to master system of magic and genetics. It describes how to combine any two animals, up to five animals, and which animals combine best, culminating in her masterpiece: the fabled Eldritch Chimaeras, a beast powerful enough to take down parties of heroes, armies, dragons, krakens, and even lesser gods. With this book, the available resources, and the will, could make (potentially) unlimited monsters of all sorts of power.

The Dark Secrets of Tarokka: A lengthy treaty written by a very hands-on researcher about the occult origins and uses of tarokka decks. It details the many cults and sects the author infiltrated over time in order to learn about unholy rituals they enacted, and how they used the cards in order to commune with dark forces and gain their favor. As the book goes on, the author slowly begins to piece together bits of information that apparently lead to something truly horrific, and right as he's about to detail the last piece of the puzzle that he had just found, his writing turns into unintelligible ramblings. The afterword found right after that is a dire warning to all those who dare to try and follow in the author's footsteps, and is allegedly signed by an archdemon, ancient one or some other kind of sufficiently powerful embodiment of evil and/or chaos.

The Trials of the Forsaken, by Bertram Wondles: A unique, ornate and gilded tome bound in some sort of tanned and scraped hide begins as a treatise on the depredations of the criminals known as the Forsaken. As the author writes the heavily researched stories, it becomes clear that with each new revelation described within, the author's madness and envy of the Forsaken grows. Quickly, the documentary writing shifts into more of a manual of praise and worship, detailing the dark rites of the path that the Forsaken walked. At the conclusion of the book, it is revealed that the binding of the book is none other than the flayed skin of Bertram Wondles himself. This book radiates a subtle but insidious evil that corrupts readers and holders alike.

Tome of Higher Constellations: A huge book created by an anonymous scholar in Prague, for the library of Rudolf II. The first half of the book consists of astronomical tables: meticulously compiled and corrected, but nothing out of the ordinary. However, the second half introduces more charts, graphs, from a wide range of sciences natural and occult. Through complex calculations these are cross-referenced with the heavenly constellations. Uncanny patterns, otherwise hidden, emerge… making it possible to trace and predict the finest shifts of the celestial spheres that command the fate of the whole universe. The final result is a single date in the future, when all factors align, and major, cosmic changes are possible. Actions undertaken on that day will bear major consequences: warlords bent on world domination crave to know this date, alchemists and mages seek it as the date of their opus magnum or most complex ritual…

The Voynich Manuscript: An illustrated codex, hand-written in an otherwise unknown writing system, that can only be described as 'Voynichese'. The vellum on which it is written is over 500 years old and stylistically appears to have been composed during the renaissance of that time period. The manuscript currently consists of around 240 pages, but there is evidence that additional pages are missing. Some pages are foldable sheets of varying size. Most of the pages have fantastical illustrations or diagrams, some crudely colored, with sections of the manuscript showing people, fictitious plants, astrological symbols, occult formula, mystic equations and arcane schematics. The text is written from left to right. The manuscript is named after Wilfrid Voynich, a book dealer who was the first person recorded to have purchased it nearly half a millennia ago. Since that time it has believed to have been held in Beinecke University's Rare Book and Manuscript Library. Knowledgeable PC's are aware that the origins, authorship, and purpose of the manuscript are debated. Various hypotheses have been suggested, including that it is an otherwise unrecorded script for a natural language or constructed language; an unread code, cipher, or other form of cryptography; or simply a meaningless hoax. The Voynich manuscript has been studied by many professional and amateur cryptographers, including military codebreakers. The manuscript has never been demonstrably deciphered, and none of the many hypotheses proposed over the last few hundred years have been independently verified. The mystery of its meaning and origin has excited the popular imagination, making it the subject of study and speculation.